@A MyChronicPainTeam Member
I have not had any experience with anything you are goin through. I want you to know that I am praying for you.

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A MyChron...

I agree about being fed up with docs. But don't pay them and all hell breaks loose.

Angelina,
Thank you so much for responding. I think we can agree on the same things. I have become disgusted with doctors. I won't get into all the details now. I knew I was not alone I just am glad I finally found these site.
I am really struggling with the living thing my life is different now. The pain is much worse and I have no energy after this med change. In fact, I have lost so much muscle since the surgery and meds, it is a struggle to keep moving and is extra painful I cannot drive right now because of this. Driving was my favorite thing to do. I want to write more but please understand that I cannot now. Thank you for all of your ideas. I hope to share some with you soon. Have a safe and blessed day

I felt saddened when I read about your terrible suffering, and now the loss of Fentanyl. I have found that doctors can't seem to empathize with our pain or the consequences of taking away pain meds that sustain us. It sounds like you are in a very bad state so I hope you have loving people in your life.
When you say you can't take it anymore, l was reminded that I used those same words with my primary care physician yesterday. Her answer was: "Medicine has nothing more to offer you." And of course, no pain meds are offered. I took Oxycodone for years, but it doesn't work anymore, even if someone would prescribe it. It felt like a slap in the face, because like you, I crawl from one day to the next, wondering if I can face another day. However, I must, because my 94-year-old mother with dementia lives with me. So I must go on for her.
But at 56, you seem too young for all this. At least I am 77 and have enjoyed a career and life abroad, so I try not to feel sorry for myself and try to feel grateful for a lifetime of good health.
I don't know what to advise you about withdrawal as I've never experienced it, but I do know something about how to get through one more day when suicidal thoughts fill my brain.
I don't know if this helps, but I try to find quality moments in the day -one day at a time- moments when I don't hurt, or when I look out my window to watch the woodpeckers attacking the tree. These moments don't add up to much when balanced with daily pain, but if one is to keep going, we must fight for every positive or moment of life-quality we can find. It may be listening to a song, or watching clouds, or even enjoying a chocolate treat-or whatever.
But it is during those times when you most feel at the end of your ability to cope when each waking moment becomes a challenge. In those moments I try to leave my body- I call it a pain-break through meditation or minimal exercises if I can manage them at all If I succeed, I feel I have won a small battle against the pain. That small success makes me feel that I can control the pain instead of it controlling me.
Anyway, do feel free to reach out and share your thoughts, because you are NOT alone. Angelina (Mahrem).

Thank you I am sorry you have to go through all this pain but I am now going through so much pain since they reduced my meds. I don't know how you get through. I am already struggling badly. It is nice to have others to share with